To be honest, after meeting my Chilean host family, my worries about them specifically vanished. The only slight disappointment was that I expected my sisters to act more my age, but they were definitely “working young adults” already—they just lived at home. I should have realized this because my Costa Rican host brother last summer was in this same stage of life. This wasn’t too much of a problem though, as I realized that I would just have a different role in the family than I had originally thought. By now–after almost two weeks of living with them–I have settled happily into the role of their younger sister that they joke with, mentor, and look out for. I even gained a big brother of sorts, as my oldest sister has a steady pololo (Chilean slang for “boyfriend”) who is very funny and basically a member of the immediate family.
The bigger challenge once I moved in with my host family was adjusting to Chilean culture in general. My first impression of it was that it was much less tranquila than other Hispanic cultures I was familiar with. It seemed more fast-paced, more lively, with more things always going on than I was expecting (although maybe the characteristics of my specific host family had something to do with that). I guess it seemed more like American culture than I was expecting. This should not have been surprising because of all countries in Latin America, I have known for awhile that Chile is one of the most (if not the most) westernized. All Chileans seem to have stuff to do, just like in the U.S., but it seems like a different kind of busy. When I think of “being busy” in the U.S., I think of an endless grind, running from place to place, doing chores and duties and generally being miserable doing them. Here in Arica, I feel like people are simply “active” about their lives in all aspects. They seem to take the initiative and the time to get together for family events, with friends, etc. as part of their schedules. They do these social/recreational activities in addition to (and sometimes in conjunction with) their jobs, meals, daily chores, etc. They seem generally more engaged with their lives and the people in them as they go about their “daily grind.”
At the same time though, after almost three weeks here, I feel like some aspects of Chilean culture are more extreme than in American culture. For example, drinking/smoking seem like a much bigger part of daily life; the meals are bigger; there is so much meat and fast food and soda; everything is later (like meals and parties); and everyone seems extroverted and talks fast, just to name a few.
On the second night with my family, they hosted an asado (party of friends/family) at our house. Lots of family and friends were invited whom I didn’t know, and I was actually excited because I thought it would be a good opportunity to make friends who were around my sister’s age (which I perceived as close enough to my age). However, much to my disappointment and surprise, I found it very difficult to relate to the younger people at the party. Although they generally didn’t make explicit efforts to include me in their conversations, I don’t think they did this purposely. It seemed like they were just really into what they were talking about and each other (as best friends) that they didn’t get a chance to / didn’t think to do so. I know I would have felt at least slightly awkward in that situation no matter what, since I was the only one who didn’t know everyone and since I’m not a native Spanish-speaker. However, I felt like my huge boot, my newness to the family, and the fact that I don’t drink or smoke set me even more apart. Also contributing to the dynamic was the fact that everyone spoke very quickly, used a lot of Chilean slang, and were talking about topics I didn’t really have a lot to contribute to. Consequently, I mostly just observed what was happening rather than engaging in it, which was an interesting anthropological experience no doubt, but also kind of depressing. As an extrovert, I very much would have liked to interact more with everyone, but I was held back by the intimidating size of the group and my slowly returning confidence in my Spanish skills.
Despite all of this, the night actually ended up being a kick-starter for me in terms of beginning my real adjustment to my study abroad experience here in Chile. By the end of the night, some of the guests had left, so the group was smaller, providing me with the opportunity to talk to a few of my sister’s friends. I gained more confidence once I realized they were sincere and kind and after they complimented me on my Spanish. From this night forward, the kind of flexibility I had developed in Kenya seemed to kick in, and I have since been able to gradually but genuinely settle into my new environment and life. So far…
I am intrigued by the content of my classes, which focus on public health, traditional medicine, and community empowerment. I am relieved that the program does not seem as academically intense as I had originally expected, and I am loving my first reintroduction to free time since I graduated high school.
My ankle is getting stronger, and I have a greater range of motion as each day passes. I am also able to tolerate more and more walking every day.
I have realized that my social outings will depend more on my American peers in my program than my host sisters, who are usually busy working or hanging out with their own friends—again not what I had expected, but also totally fine because I am beginning to form closer bonds with the people in my program. I have also realized that I have very flexible and carefree host parents who either encourage me to stay out later than I do or constantly insist that I bring friends over. I am making progress in my relationship with Tomás, our pesado chihuahua. Sometimes he doesn’t even bark at me when I walk into the room unaccompanied (baby steps).
I noticed an improvement in my Spanish within just the first couple of days of staying with my host family. Their comments about how pleasantly surprised they are that I speak such good Spanish gives me even more confidence to practice speaking with strangers whenever I can (since unfortunately most of my American peers prefer to speak in English when we are talking amongst ourselves).
And I am starting to gain a sense of direction regarding where things are in the city (although not as much as my peers, since I don’t walk around as much as them).
Overall, I am enjoying life pretty well right now (despite coming down with a cold). Reflecting on my experience thus far, I am pretty proud of myself that I have been able to turn such a rushed transition into a successful one (so far), and I hope I continue on the path of making the most of this once-in-a-lifetime experience. I really did care about doing both my program in Kenya and my program here enough to be willing to rush from one to the other. Fortunately, I am pretty happy with how I have managed it so far, so here’s to hoping more good things are to come!
Así Es la Escuela de la Vida 